I really should apologize for what I’m trying to do here. I want people to learn how easy it is to make great food at home. That’s good, right? Until you go out to your favorite restaurant, and realize … damn, this ain’t so special.
My bad, sorry about that.
This is most likely to happen if your favorite restaurant is one of the “casual dining” chain places, like T.G.I.Friday’s or Applebee’s. You’ll order the chicken parmesan, and about halfway through it you’ll realize, “This is a frozen pre-cooked patty, reheated and covered in canned sauce. This sucks.”
Congratulations, you’re now a good cook. Did I forget to mention that once you can cook you’re not going to be as impressed by restaurant fare any more?
The last two restaurants I’ve gone to were Italian places. One came highly recommended, the other was a place we had gotten pizza from years ago, but never dined in. And we’re not going back to either. The garlic bread was overcooked and had almost no garlic, the chicken was obviously frozen, and the sauce was bland. Bleaugh.
What’s your worst dining-out experience?
Was the food just plain bad? Did it not live up to the hype? Or was it the service that ruined it?
Leave a comment telling me about the worst meal you’ve ever paid for.
Want more like this? For more recipes like this, that you can hold right in your hands, and write on, take notes, tear pages out if you want (Gosh, you're tough on books, aren't you?) you might be interested in How To Cook Like Your Grandmother, 2nd edition, Illustrated. Or to learn your way around the kitchen, check out Starting From Scratch: The Owner's Manual for Your Kitchen.
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39 Comments
This is so true. It also doesn’t help when, because you cook, you know just how much cheaper what you’re eating would be at home.
I’ve also learned that when it comes to menu and portion sizes, bigger generally means poorer quality food.
Being new to the area we went to dinner at a local establishment, always seeing lots of cars we were hopeful for a wonderful meal. What we got instead was a grease laden mess on a plate with stares from all the regulars and eyes glaring from the doorway because we evidently were seated at their favorite table. Needless to say, we haven’t ventured back in and have no plans to!
Just last week I took my mother out for lunch to a new pasta place she wanted to try in Belmont, NH. We both ordered pasta with a scampi sauce, the flavor very bland and I actually poured off over a cup of butter/grease?? from both of our plates to show the waitress how gross it was. The only saving grace was the waitress was fantastic, and no, we didn’t end up paying for it as she thought it was gross too!
South Beach in Miami. Some pasta. Disgusting. I guess you can’t have it all.
We had been told about a great little English pub in AZ. We went, as we are English, expecting good English fayre, instead, my fish and chips came up. My Fish was frozen, and had been microwaved, but the center still had crystals in, and the chips were from a frozen batch, totally gross, never been back! Yay for cooking better food at home
For Valentine’s Day, my husband and I, went to a big name restaurant (RT).
I was expecting a very good crab cake dinner, but instead I could barely eat it at all.
The baked potatoe wasn’t good either. (How can a restaurant mess up a baked potatoe except for burning it). The only half way good thing on the plate was the rice pilaf which was bland. Very disappointing for a big name company.
We at a Margarita’s in Martin City, MO. Our waitress spent much of the time talking to a couple of guys near her age 2 tables away. We had to tell her we needed menus, we were ready to order, we needed refills, we were waiting on the check–I don’t recall her doing a thing without us telling her we needed it done. She brought the check, I gave her my card, she took off for 5 minutes, came back and said Sorry, the machine is broken, I can copy off the info and run it later. We declined, paid her cash, debated what to tip her. I left 2c, figured that was a lot more than she was worth. We complained about the service to the only person near the front, and left, the ‘waitress’ followed us out the door–yelled out, Thanks a lot! and gave a 1 finger salute. Food was decent, service the worst we’ve ever had. I was totally unable to find anyway to send a comment to the store–their email was returned, the phone was never answered. On the good side, the place closed less than a year later.
Melt in Independence. It was a place to be seen, not to eat. It may have been the most awesome place to be if I were a hipster, or college kid, but I’m just a normal Cleveland guy. The food was the same as they serve at other casual chains, just a little more cheese.
Really? Melt is one of the darlings of Food Network. Of course I think they’re usually talking about the one in Westlake. I’ve halfway wanted to go check it out.
One of my worst meals was a stop at a Days Inn – moving from NH to FL – and stopped for the night – for convenience I ate in the adjacent restaurant and thought “how can you screw up a pork chop” – well I found out – was cooked beyond getting a knife through it – and the mashed potatoes were out of a box with canned gravy over it that tasted like a flavored grease – the green beans, I knew those were going to be canned but was an off-brand, extremely salty and lots of vine stems still attached to bean. Since the dinner was so bad, I thought I would settle my stomach with some vanilla ice cream – now how could you screw that up – welll try a block of cut ice cream wrapped in a paper that I had a hard time separateing from the ice cream – and the ice cream left a film on the roof of my mouth – was like a bad taste for hours. For the first time in my life I bought an antacid tablet to try and settle my stomach. Even the water served had a very strong taste of chlorine and you kind of wondered why the content was so high?
Eww. Someone had to really work to make something so consistently bad from top to bottom.
You have to give them points for trying so hard for it to be so bad.
Several years ago when The Olive Garden opened up in our area, a friend of mine and I went there. I got the ravioli and it was frozen, I sent it back 4 times and it never got cooked all the way through. We were there for 3 hours waiting for my meal to come out right and it never happened. I complained and we were offered a free desert. It took me a very long time to go back there again.
I lived in Florida a dozen years ago and I was living in my cousins guest house. Well every weekend they would hit various restaurants around Fort Meyers and I would join them. There was a seafood place that imported lobsters from New England and we went there. Being a New Englander I was stunned how they actually over cooked lobsters! We hit a variety of places in the year I lived there and it was always the same, I realized I was a much better cook than the people working in the restaurant kitchen. The only reason I went was to spend time with family, who were happy with the food we ate.
Years ago I had a pretty good meal in a Thai restaurant in London but the dessert was so bad it was good again. Similar in concept to desserts I have actually eaten in Thailand it was, nevertheless, appalling – ice that appeared to have been scraped out of a freezer whilst defrosting was mixed with cold green noodles, little dice of TCP flavoured jelly and mung beans. This was formed into a pyramid and artificial food colouring in a range of hues was generously poured over the top and dribbled down the sides. I did pay for it but it was well worth it for the laugh!
Why do people go into catering when they can’t cook?
A “rib” place in Independence, IA….raw ribs and poor service.
I was compelled to write a letter to Applebee’s after a particularly horrific experience, and if Drew doesn’t mind (though I can’t exactly ask in advance), I’ll just copy & paste the pertinent portions here.
Our most recent dinner out was at Applebees where we had ordered the same meal. The meal was one of the new entrees that Applebees has advertised on TV. The meat was too salty and the caramelized onions were still raw and had a bite to them. Raw onions can have the bite removed simply by rinsing raw onions under hot water for 10 seconds. The vegetables were still slightly raw also. Needless to say we will not go there again.
My husband travels constantly and when he’s home he wants home cooking. One of the few times that I talked him into taking me out to eat was a couple of years ago to a well known local BBQ place. The owner was serving the food and he actually glared at us and we went through the line, like by us just looking we were stealing it or something. He was extremely stingy with the portions and the food just wasn’t good. We got a tiny amount of beans and potato salad (about a spoonful) , a couple of slices of sausage, a couple of very thin slices of brisket, a slice of bread, tea, and banana pudding (the best part.) I ate it because I was hungry and it wasn’t my cooking for once but my husband and son refused to even eat it. They complained the whole time we were there about how much better my BBQ was. I was really disappointed in the dinner but happy to see how much my family likes my cooking.
Being allergic to corn, we’ve not eaten out for over 4 years and are not likely to in the foreseeable future. I don’t think I’ve ever really had a fantastic dining experience in any restaurant other than a locally owned Greek restaurant years ago. Having said that, I would put up with not-too-disgusting food once a month if I could just get someone else to cook and do the dishes for me. I’ve never missed the food, but I sure miss the “break” of eating out.
Well… I’m a Culinary student at Cerritos College, and I have to say, since I began the program, I enjoy cooking immensely, at school. But when I get home, there’s nothing to use to make a good meal with, plus I hate going to the store, so I can’t say I enjoy cooking at home too much, especially since I don’t have all the tools from the school kitchen at my disposal, the oven here isn’t hot enough and the stoves aren’t big enough! I still do like to experiment at home sometimes, making things from scratch, my family loves it… maybe a little too much. XD They constantly ask me to make them certain things and when I try to teach them how to do it themselves they’re disinterested and just down right REFUSE.
BUT: On to the point – I’ve had a few bad experiences in the bad meal department… Top 3,
#3 Chef Salad from Chris and Pitts in Bellflower California. I was hungry… after I ate it. It got me sick reeeal quick. it tasted bad and I got a horrible case of you know whats from it. lol
#2 ANYTHING from Taco Bell, but I suppose that’s a givin.
#1 Chicken Picatta from my school. We run a cafe and have a variety of things on the menu, that monstrosity of a dish being one of them. I guess people just don’t know how to make it. They overcook the angel hair pasta and the flavor of it is like eating a melted plastic spoon. I KNOW the people who make it because they’re my classmates!!! I can’t say I’m pro at making it, because I know very well, no matter who makes it, the dish sucks ass. It just doesn’t have any kind of appeal to it, and I have NOOO fucking idea why so many people order it every time we have it. I throw up a little every time a ticket comes in for that thing.
I like picatta, but hate overcooked pasta. That’s part of the reason I don’t like angel hair — it goes from “done” to “mush” in about eight seconds. I prefer a thicker spaghetti.
Chris & Pitt’s was a greasy spoon 25 years ago, and the last time I swung through Bellflower (5 years ago?) it looked like the place was unchanged except for age. I can’t imagine it’s improved with time.
So True! Since we really got into cooking everything from scratch with the freshest possible ingredients, I can hardly get my wife to go out to dinner anymore, unless it is to one of the best couple of restaurants in town, or the Thai place, where everything is delicious and Fresh. I have to say, I like the prices at the Thai joint a lot better!
I truly feel sorry for people who were never taught to cook or took the initiative to learn. They only go out to restaurants and actually think it is good tasting food. Cooking isn’t that hard!
Well, hubby and I tried a newer restaurant down the street – “French Press”. A coffee bar and crepes. Hubby’s sweet (vs. savory) crepe was pretty good, but mine…ugh. I ordered an caramel apple pie crepe, and an Italian cream soda. The caramel sauce was smokey burned tasting, the apples were still hard, and the cream they put in the cream soda was probably about 1 hour past the maximum spoiled time. I didn’t finish either of them. Ugh. Ever had spoiled cream in a drink – not a good thing….
My favorite thing about restaurants are the menus. That gives me all kinds of great ideas for things to cook at home. Tonight we’re having Frisco Burgers (which is how I came to this site because I’m researching various ways to make onion rings) which I know will be better than any restaurant in town.
P.S. I did sign up for the newsletter and if there are scantily dressed women in it, I’ll do my best to ignore it. (I’ll ignore any grammatical errors, too.)
hahahaha..my thoughts exactly
When I ran summer camps for kids we took a field trip to the Olive Garden for a cooking camp. As we toured the kitchen I thought to myself, what’s missing here? Even as a non-foodie (at the time) I realized it was that there was no line. Nowhere for the cooks to actually cook food. Just areas for chopping salad and heating things up. Every bit of their food, save salad, is brought in frozen. My daughter worked there later and confirmed this.
and yet they charge you like they are making the pasta fresh right there, its no wonder they first thing they offer you is wine lol
Thanks alot, Drew. I had almost blocked it out of my mind and now it’s all rushing back! We generally like to eat out. We live in Chicago, where we can get alot of creative, ethnic food that we really enjoy. But I’ve had 2 experiences that just plain made me sick—literally and figuratively.
One was at Flat Top Grill in Evanston, IL. If you’ve never heard of it’s a small midwestern “create your own stir fry” chain. So yes, you basically make your own meal and pay someone else for it. You choose your own ingredients and sauces from this big buffet, and then give it to the cook who fries it on a big grill along with a bunch of other people’s “stir fry”. You can imagine how good this is going to taste. Not only was the food boring and bland, but the place was disgustingly dirty. The buffet was mess, there was food on the floor. It’s no surprise my husband got ill the very next day. We went there because it was highly recommended by a friend, and it’s been there for years! I can’t believe it hasn’t gone out of business by now or been closed down by the city.
The second was at Act One “Gastropub” in Chicago, IL. It’s in our neighborhood, and we went on their opening weekend. Woohoo! We had high hopes. But my pumpkin ravioli was swimming in a plateful of water, and my husband’s fish and chips were soggy and tasted like the frying oil had gone rancid—and they had JUST opened! I literally felt ill while still at the restaurant. We should have never paid. But we did and went home and I couldn’t get that nasty taste out of my mouth for weeks.
There are so many time when I realize that yes, I can cook food just as good as what I can get eating out. Hopefully this site will help. I like your sense of humor and that you don’t take things too seriously. A nice change for a food blog. Thanks!
There used to be a place like that near here. It was basically a salad bar where you filled a bowl with the veggies you wanted, told them what meat and sauce to use, and they’d cook it. The price was good, the veggies always looked fresh, and of course they closed down before I could go a second time.
Went to Mamma Lucia’s in Rockville MD last summer. We usually get pizza from there because it is passable pizza — we’re New Yorkers and what they call pizza here is disgusting. We decided to eat in rather than carry out and I ordered the chicken marsala. It had canned tomatoes in it. Plus they wanted $9 for a glass of wine. For $9 I could buy a bottle! From now on, only pizza from there.
Just found the site had to comment.
Worst so far was an fairly expensive Italian restaurant. Our “waitress” was clueless. We ordered eggplant Parmesan at her suggestion and a chicken pasta dish. The pasta dish was totally forgettable, but the eggplant was delicious, it was fresh and flavorful. They both came with an out of the box salad and a weak potato and vegetable mix covered in tomato sauce? For desert we ordered a berries in cream, I am spacing the Italian name, but regardless it was frozen solid when it shouldn’t have been. We asked our “waitress”, to which she replied “they had been accidentally left in the freezer all day.” Which I immediately thought to myself then why on earth did you serve them? She wouldn’t initially take it off the bill and suggested another desert or to let it thaw!
But the worst came when we went back for a second time for their excellent eggplant. This restaurant is about 35 minutes away. I checked their website and called for their opening hours. One said 4 pm. and the other 4:30 pm., so we got there at 4:42 pm exactly, I remember looking at the clock in the car as we parked.
The doors were locked(and even the hours on the door said open at 4:00 pm). I was there with my parents so my dad began walking around the building to find someone. He came back and heard someone talking right around the corner from the door. It was a cook and presumably the hostess/waitress. I could barely hear the conversation, but my dad came back and explained that the two had just finished cleaning up from their Sunday brunch and weren’t ready for dinner service hence customers! She suggested that we could go in order drinks at the bar and wait for them to get ready!
Needless to say this was after their stated opening time of 4:00 pm! No apology from them for not being ready, and she didn’t even offer the drinks on the house for our inconvenience! In fact she seemed to feel that we, the customers, were inconveniencing her for doing her job after they were supposed to be open and ready for diners!
We ate somewhere else, and never went back. The place closed months later, surprise, surprise.
Jessica, I wish it always worked that way, but some places seem to make bad service part of their “thing”.
Today I saw a Facebook update from the Aria hotel in Las Vegas. We love to eat in Vegas and we were comped so we had a great time. Although I noticed many people love the Sage restaurant (it got rave reviews), we hated it. I’ve never been out anywhere that I absolutely hated everything I tried. I didn’t even like the dessert. It was expensive and a total waste. Still other people love it.
I would’ve said something but I wasn’t going to complain about free food. I’m still disappointed that it wasn’t amazing. It’s like the book everyone else loved but I felt like I wasted my life reading. We found another restaurant at the Aria that we love and have returned to again and again (the Cafe we call the airport cafe).
-Janet
Hi, and first things first, thanks for your terrific website and this particularly satisfying thread
I agree, it´s true that the better a cook you become, the more critical a diner you´ll be. For me the best reason to eat out is to have things that I simply won´t, or can´t make at home. When I was living in the States this meant going to the best pizza places in Brooklyn, along with various authentic Asian or Latin American restaurants. The quality of an item produced as a specialty all day, every day, is likely going to exceed what I can reproduce for similar time and money at home. But a plate of meat/potato/veg, or pasta/salad/bread, or other similar foods would usually either disappoint or, even when really well prepared, seem overpriced for the result.
Second is, now I´m living in Europe, specifically Spain where the economy has hit the sub-basement. The daily main meal occurs midday, and for a local restaurant to survive, they´ve ·got· to cook like (a) grandmother to make it worth everyone´s time and money. Everyday foods served in restaurants here are generally a lot better in quality and preparation compared with the States; on those days when I just don´t have the time or stuff to make the main meal, I am rarely disappointed with the neighborhood bar-and-grill places. For me this is really satisfying because I´m able to be inspired and to learn something about typical dishes from examples prepared with care instead of cynicism. But it´s not like the chains and the ambiance-first type places don´t exist here, too. I just wanted to report that, happily, the grandmotherly from-scratch tradition is still possible and preferable for the smaller business here.
Drew, I just love the picture with this post! I feel this way over half the time I eat out …