My first thought when I saw that picture was, “But now how are you supposed to cook the bacon?”
I saw that photo over at Side Dish Magazine in a post mentioning the Blue Ribbon Bacon Festival in Des Moines. Did someone say “bacon eating contest”? Why yes, I believe they did.
It’s been a while since my last bacon post and … Oh, who am I kidding, there’s no reason for this except that I found some more great bacon pictures. And it’s Friday. So here’s another entry in the “women in bacon” theme.
How To Meat People And Be Loved: The Bacon Costume
Last year for Halloween, I was bacon. If you’ve never been bacon before, I highly recommend it. Everybody, you see, loves bacon. It is, as my friend Monica says, the Candy of the Meats.People do not want to be quiet about their love for bacon, they want to declare it, often loudly. Even the most shy people at least muttered “bacon!” under their breath as they passed me. I have never been so popular, so adored (and strangely, so hit-on) in my life.
I’ll be needing this link in about six months.
And to show that men can wear bacon too, there’s this.
Bacon Scented Bacon Print Tuxedo
There’s a theory that everything is better with bacon. We believe that theory with all of our heart. To that end, we are introducing our line of bacon formal wear with Uncle Oinker’s Bacon Scented Bacon Print Tuxedo. You can get married in bacon, get confirmed in bacon or go to the Oscars in bacon! Wait until Joan Rivers gets a whiff of you. Each Tuxedo is tailored from chemically treated latex print fabric in one of four different sizes. Best of all, it smells just like bacon sizzling in the pan. Dry clean only.
This one I won’t be needing the link for next year. Or the year after that. Or ever.
Want more like this? For more recipes like this, that you can hold right in your hands, and write on, take notes, tear pages out if you want (Gosh, you're tough on books, aren't you?) you might be interested in How To Cook Like Your Grandmother, 2nd edition, Illustrated. Or to learn your way around the kitchen, check out Starting From Scratch: The Owner's Manual for Your Kitchen.
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18 Comments
Love the bacon bra. But it needs to be already cooked. I’m sure a mold could be made, lined with bacon…
I really prefer not to imagine what cold, greasy bacon might feel like slapped onto my, um, lady lumps. GROSS.
It’s a whole new twist on edible undies! I better keep my husband away from this post, don’t want him getting ideas, lol! I’m just glad he didn’t see that bacon tuxedo in time for our wedding!
Bob, making the mold could be fun.
Kristin, if it’s cold it’s not greasy … yet. And you know, raw bacon just doesn’t do anything for me.
Heather, you know the difference between the class clown and the class comedian? The class clown is the one who wears a bacon tuxedo. The class comedian is the one who told him where to order it, and showed up with a camera. I’m the comedian.
hmmm… that pic of the bacon bra is kinda gross… only because that woman should have re-shaved her armpits before the photo! ewwwwwwww! that is the first thing i saw… 5:00 shadow.
the bacon tuxedo… i don’t think so.
Drew, you are so funny.
Drew, I posted this in the Bacon Nation blog I enjoy reading. Please check it out…it’s a great community.
http://baconnation.ning.com/profiles/blog/list
Does your grandmother Really Cook Like This, Drew?! I’d love to have met her–I bet she was a kick at parties! lol
How do you cook that bacon? Sunny side up of course.
I hate to say it, but that guy’s girlfriend or wife has the look that says “I got dressed up in this gorgeous dress, and everyone’s looking at the idiot in a bacon tux.”
Queenie, thanks a lot. Now that’s all I keep noticing.
Anon, I’ll take a look when I get some free time.
Jenni, now that’s funny. My grandmother would have been horrified.
Dave, I’m not sure quite what that means, but I still think it’s right.
Stephanie, I read it more as, “I’m not getting paid nearly enough for this crap.” That or, “This shoot is not going in my portfolio.”
Kristin-That was the first thing I thought of, too. All gooey and ew…and then you would smell like raw bacon for DAYS. Haha I’ll stick to frying and eating it, thanks.
This whole thing was too funny. My husband was trying to get work done, but I kept bugging him to show him the next thing on it. I love the bacon tux…although the guy wearing it looks to be enjoying himself a bit too much, and there should be a warning on it to stay away from dogs. That could get ugly!
Umm….wow. I’m truly horrified by bacon bra lady.
I’m right there with Kristin. No thanks to raw slimy bacon.
Tamara, I hadn’t thought about the dog issue. I was stuck on the “chemically treated latex print fabric”. I’ll bet that breathes so nicely on a hot day.
Sweet Bird, the more I think about it the less appealing it is. And it didn’t start out all that great.
You have obviously never lived in a Muslim country hehehehe
That bra adds new meaning to the term “food porn”
Makxberr, no I haven’t.
Wenchzilla, I don’t know how I didn’t think of that myself. Now I have to try real hard not to go looking for more like that.
The bacon bra is not recommended for those who, um, need a lot of support. Nor is it recommended for dog owners, regardless of whether the raw or cooked version is used.
I hadn’t thought of the pet issues. You are most likely right.
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[...] you’re seeking to take your bacon obsession to the next level, perhaps you would consider a bacon bra. Nothing says “Nice to meat you!” like bacon scented [...]